A Relatively Short Essay on Why I Now Hate Missouri
25 comments so far
July 23, 2008 by
I think I hate this Missouri football team. I'm not certain because I've never had strong feelings for the Tigers before this season but I've found myself actually thinking a lot about the Missouri-Nebraska bell this summer. It's not like some rivalries (OU-Texas, Alabama-Auburn, et al.) where the football is just the physical manifestation of some deep-seated regional tension. I feel no ill-will towards the Show-Me State as a whole, in fact my family tree has some pretty deep roots there, but I do hate the 2008 Missouri Tigers...and the Cardinals...and Budweiser now that it's Belgian (as if they didn't have enough beer), but beyond those three things I'm perfectly fine with Missouri.
Now, this is unchartered territory for me, this sudden hatred, and I think that's because this is unchartered territory for the University of Missouri football program as well: They're supposed to be good this year, really good, and that raises two very interesting questions: 1) who likes a favorite? and 2) how will Missouri respond to their new status as reyes del norte?
Like every Nebraska fan who grew up with two conference daddies in the Big 8 and then the Big 12, I followed pretty conventional hating guidelines. Oklahoma was the first rival and then there was...not Oklahoma. When my Big 12 daddy made Christmas a triennial affair and replaced it with Easter--"It's still happening at the same time each year," he would scream--I tried to play along but truth be told I liked a lot of things Colorado had to offer as well. (Coors Original, Rockmount shirts, the idea of snow-shoeing.) And if Colorado was like replacing Christmas with Easter then Missouri was like the 4th of July, a standalone holiday where all you hoped for was to see something entertaining and not have to work too hard to do it.
Now, of course, that's all completely different. Nebraska can't go down to Columbia these days without giving up 41 points. The Tigers are the defending Big 12 North champions and a unanimous preseason pick to repeat as such. They're the consensus #6 team in the nation to start the season. They might have a Heisman trophy winner in their backfield. Jeremy Maclin is as volatile and lethal as nitroglycerin. Suffice it to say: these are heady times for the Missouri Tigers.
And that's why I hate them. Because while Gary Pinkel was taking the Tigers to unparalleled heights in 2007, Bill Callahan was pushing Nebraska to can't be believed lows and that disparity has me coveting that damn bell like never before.
But I think this is good, this hatred. The metaphorical back in the corner, swing from the heels attitude will be useful come October 4 and it's not all Nebraska has going for it. As the most heralded Missouri team in the school's history, the '08 Tigers will have to deal with something that's mostly foreign to the Missouri football program: national expectations.
In 2007, Missouri finished #4 in the AP poll, the highest end of the seasonl ranking in their history, but they started the season unranked. In 1960 the Tigers started the season unranked before ascending to the top spot in the polls, a ranking that wouldn't be reached again until last year, and finishing at #5. Note specifically the "unranked" connection in those previous two sentences.
The only good comparison for what this 2008 team is attemtping to do, replicate or best the winningest season in school history while, and here's the key here, being expected to replicate or best the season in school history, are the '68 and '69 squads. The 1968 Missouri team finished 9th in the AP poll at 8-3, then climbed to 6th at the end of 1969 by going 9-2.
But I have a feeling that Tigers fans are looking for a little more than a two-loss season and top 10 ranking this season. They could be favored in every game they play--at Texas on October 18 seems like the only possible exception--and they have a lofty ranking that will only be bolstered by a deceptively "tough" season opener against Illinois. Regardless of what Nebraska does against Virginia Tech, the first real test for the Tigers looks like their trip to Lincoln, where they haven't won since 1978 (a span that encompasses my entire life). Think that will be a big game?
Honestly, I like our chances. I'm not sure what bearing the Missouri teams from '78, '88, or '98 have on this current iteration but I do know that none of them were expected to win in Lincoln. This team is and I like that. Are historical advantages real or just psychological? If it is just psychological isn't that almost as good as being real? Either way, I like where we're at 73 days away from homecoming.
So why do I hate this Missouri team with an unusual breadth and depth this season? Because Missouri is better than they've ever been and, right now, they're better than Nebraska.
For that reason, going forward I am completely focused on loathing Missouri.
And the Cardinals.
And Belgian Budweiser.
But that's it.
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Rock Chalk Jul 23 08
Welcome to the club.
Signed,
Every Kansas Fan
bnahusker Jul 23 08
Hey Brandon,
Try wearing Red, and living here!
When I arrived in Springfield in 1991 you couldn't find Mizzou fans, other than alums. If someone was a D-1 fan, they were Sooner or Razorback fans. Now, like a bumble bee nest explosion from a cartoon, they are everywhere. The Bandwagoners love to hang out in my face now that they have had a better year than our beloved Huskers. But if History is any indicator I won't have to deal with them for long. To be fair, I have some friends that wore Gold and Black years ago. To them I wish only the best for their team until they hit Lincoln (and hopefully get hit back!) Feel and acknowledge the hate for a while and understand that while they may have a year or two fling with success, most Husker fans have a lifelong relationship, and we will prevail.
While I’m here, I must address your Cardinal hate issue. These fans come very close to matching our support and zeal for their beloved Redbirds. For the most part, it is a class orginazation. If they would only get rid of LaLoser as their manager!
GBR!
Bob
P.S. Drink Scotch, and Bud won't be a problem!
Brandon Jul 23 08
As a Cubs fan, a Cardinals supporter could save my life and I'd still be forced to dislike him or her.
Just the way the world works.
DT Jul 23 08
I'll usually be on board with most everything you have to say, Brandon...But here's one instance that I can't go down the same road. As you allude to a great point: Miss Zu (I haven't seen that one before, so I'll assume that I just came up with it!) has topped NU's season record exactly once in my lifetime (and I was alive in 1978). Anyone under 40 can accurately say such, as the last time it happened before last year was 1968. Take it 50 years back and Missouri took advantage of the Bill Jennings era (bettering NU's record in '58, '59, '60 & '61) to push the total to six whopping seasons in the last 50. So, even if you want to go back a half-century...I'm afraid that 12% of anything does not a trend make...and I guess I reserve "hatred" for more than just mere freaks of statistical anomaly.
If I'm supposed to feel compelled to "hate" such a Johnny-come-lately, I don't. Being the dismissive, arrogant NU fan that I am...I don't think so, not even for a minute. In the tradition of great Husker rivalries, I think you have to respect an opponent in order to "hate" them. The last time I noticed, Chase Daniel got made to look a fool in Lincoln (by none other than Kevin Cosgrove). Is that a condition that really merits respect and/or hate? Again, I don't think so.
I think bnahusker really hit on it with his reference to "a year or two fling with success"...I like how certain folks run their mouths about how NU's never gonna come back...and by means of the results of a single season, they can state that the Missouri's and Kansas's of the world have passed us by forever. "The run is over...you're no longer relevant" and so on. Now, I may even get a certain sense of satisfaction from Miami having a losing season, but do I actually delude myself into believing that they're never going to return to being a dominant force in college football?! Not a chance. I have enough sense to know that Miami being bad is as big of an anomaly as Missouri being good is. Call me a sucker for quantitative analysis, but the historical results are what they are for a reason. Hey, even Boise State wins the Fiesta Bowl once every hundred years or so. That doesn't mean that they don't have light years to go before they've passed OU by as a program...or that any OU fan spends any significant amount of "hatred" directed toward the Broncos.
But I get what you're saying here...this is just the rare time that I'll have to agree to disagree.
darren Jul 23 08
I'm on board with Brandon's definition of "hate" here, because it is sort of this groan-worthy disgust. Like "Oh jeez, the last thing NU needs is another team to be their 'rival' right now. Isn't this why OU and CU exist?"
To a lesser degree, it is what we went through with KSU. Granted MU didn't come from the depths that the 'cats did. But it still feels like "come on, really? We're looking up at those guys to try an take back the division?"
Compounding all of this is the fact that NU was *right there* in 2006, with the division in our control. And in one absolutely awful swoop, we gave ground to just about everybody else, and Missouri was one of two teams that surged way ahead. The other being KU.
DT Jul 23 08
Yeah, Darren, I'll go with "groan-worthy disgust"...your likening it to KSU is a good comparison. But for me, it elicits more of a sense of being annoyed by that which soon too will pass than actual "hate". I guess that was the point I was trying to make. Stick around for 10 or 20 years and I may grow to begrudgingly offer my "hate" as the rivalry continues to develop (ala CU: When they took a couple at home in the late 80's, it didn't instigate the "hate" factor...it was after they consistently played us tough/won at our place in the late 90's/2000's that the respect--and in turn the hate--kicked in). Missouri's a long way from that status as of now. But beating us at home for the first time in 30 years could very well mark a big step in that direction. Although, the very circumstances of such a hypothetical Missouri win forms a lot of the basis of my opinion as to exactly why they won't...it remains one of those things I'll have to see to believe. And like everyone else, I've seen enough these last few years to believe that the cart full of truth as used to I know it has been turned upside-down. But yet, to the last strand of hope I cling.
Still, if you look at the rough patch that is known as the last 10 years of NU football, you'll find a lot more ugly 3-4 TD Husker victories on the record than you do 41-6 Missouri wins. That tells me that they've still got a ways to go...especially considering how much they've run their mouths the last 10 months. You've got to earn my "hate" and it takes a little bit more than they've achieved as a program to be worthy of such at this point. Maybe actually winning something aside from a few home games against the worst 5-year span of NU teams in a half-century might help get a little respect/hatred going their way...Like maybe a conference championship? By my last count, we've got 17 of them since we split one with the '69 squad that Brandon mentioned. But, as Brandon pointed out, history suggests that the odds are rather long on their getting anything of the sort done this year...
But hey, Duke drilled NU in the 1955 Orange Bowl and they've got David Cutcliffe this year, so who knows?!
ze bop Jul 23 08
Daaang!! I come home from work and sit down for some enjoyable blogging and lo and behold FRIGGIN MIZ-ZOO ARTICLES ALL OVER THIS SITE!!!
Please make it stop!!!
I really don't even wanna think about Missouri until we beat them at home this year. Really the only time I ever hated them was when they beat us in '78, bumping us outta the numero uno spot and then I had to go to the Orange Bowl with the NU marching band and watch us play the Sooners again. We all know how that turned out. Missouri ruined my whole trip to Miami, YO!!
But they are not a rival to Big Red. What, they've beaten us like 3-4 times in 40 yrs, the '78 game the only one of any significance, and that was the last time they beat us at home. Even Calli beat them a few times I think. HA HA HA, some rival.
K, they are good now, Daniels is the difference maker, so if we can get in his face again this year we win!!! woohoo! MacClin is good, but not Michael Crabtree good. But if Chase is chased around and put on his keester all day then MacClin wont be doing squat. End of story.
OMG, I cant talk about Miz-zoo anymore. Call me in 20 yrs and see how they've done against Big Red in that time and maybe then there will be a rivalry.
The Huskers have no rival anymore. OU is our true rival even though they arent our rival anymore either--capice?
Give it a few yrs and Big Red will be the dominant force in the Big XII north again, playing OU in the CC game every year, thus resuming our true rivalry....
p.s., I dont want to see one more Mizzoo article here til the week of that game..
ze out
DT Jul 23 08
Don't forget...there are like four guys named "Chase" on Missouri.
Brandon Jul 23 08
DT,
As good as everything else you said was, that last comment may have swayed me.
I'll admit to having a keen love for the underdog. As much as people naturally gravitate towards the Hickory Huskers of the world I think my predisposition for the little guy is a bit excessive. I try not to admit it but I think this is why I'm drawn to the Cubs and U.S. Soccer so strongly.
That said, it should be a sad state of affairs now that Nebraska is looking to spoil Missouri's season, but I'm absolutely jacked for 10/4. I guess that's just the kind of guy I am.
Husker Mike Jul 23 08
It isn't Missouri's fault that Bill Callahan ran the Husker program into the ditch. As the Husker prayer says, we applaud the winners as they pass by.
Day by day, we get better and better.
ze bop Jul 23 08
"....Don't forget...there are like four guys named "Chase" on Missouri...."
And I suppose their main booster is 'Chase Manhattan".
Raz Jul 24 08
I have hated Mizzou since Brad Smith. I have really hated Mizzou since they invented the "get to the line fast and look at the coaches for the play" against the Blackshirts! I don't know his record versus Nebraska, but against them he was amazing(I throw up in my mouth a little) Brad F'n Smith!!
Mortimer P. Blort Jul 24 08
You mention natural rivalries between Auburn/Alabama and Texas/Oklahoma. Soooo ... what do Nebraska and Missouri have way back in the cobwebs of history that we can exhume and drag through the mud? Hmmmmm ...
Shackles and bullwhips ring a bell?
Ahhh, yes ... Missouri was a slave state. Nebraska was free. Skirmishes along the border. Hunting parties after fugitive slaves seeking freedom. That's some good stuff on which to base a natural rivalry, don't you think?
Brandon Jul 24 08
Mortimer,
I'm all for awakening dormant Kansas-Nebraska Act/Missouri Compromise tension.
Unfortunately, I don't think I've ever heard anyone other than you cite it as a reason for hating Missouri but if you want to start a movement, I'm on board.
DT Jul 24 08
"Hunting parties after fugitive slaves seeking freedom"..."4 guys named Chase"--it all seems to make so much more sense now! Thanks for clearing that up with the little history refresher, Mortimer. I'm even starting to change my tune about hating Missouri (well, the state and it's inhabitants, at least...it's still beneath me to recognize their silly little football program as worthy of anything but my annoyance at their dumb luck these past few years at their place).
Man, you just never know what you're gonna get here at the BRN!
bnahusker Jul 24 08
DT!
Don't hate ALL of the inhabitants of Missouri! Some of us are just displaced! I'd think about moving home (Lincoln) but there are too many miles of "Twisties" to ride down here, and Nebraska's taxes would kill me!
GBR!
Bob
DT Jul 24 08
bnahusker,
Let the record dictate that my comments should be amended as follows:
...I'm even starting to change my tune about hating Missouri (well, the state and it's NATIVES, at least)...
I always forget about the large number of Nebraska expats that live in surrounding states and elsewhere when I'm going about my business of disparaging such...sorry about the slight!
DT Jul 24 08
And I probably should've further amended it to edit "the state and ITS natives"...but I doubt many native Missourians would've noticed my improper use of an apostrophe within the possessive adjective "its" anyway. But there you go.
Mortimer P. Blort Jul 24 08
You know how our band does the school song before the game?
Just a small and humble suggestion to the high priests of the Pride of All Nebraska: instead of brass and woodwinds at that moment of high respect, this year consider percussion with spoons and banjos and fiddles and washtub bass and washboard and what-not and somesuch, playing "Fight Tigers" in the old-timey hillbilly way.
DT Jul 24 08
That's the stuff right there...Mortimer P. Blort-I've never seen a post on here from you before today (but I may have just not been paying attention). But I love it. You get the elusive "LOL" and you should know that I don't go handing those out to just anyone. Funny stuff...
bnahusker Jul 24 08
Let the record show that DT has revised and extended his remarks to an acceptable use of language and puntuation.
I was sure that you wouldn't hate Husker fans in hostile territories. Any implied or inferred slights are forgiven.
Let the record also show that I work with a few people that have the instruments AND appropriate sheet music for Mortimer P. Blort's request! I'll see if they are booked that weekend, or if they already have a gig. I'm sorry to inform you that the only qualified conductor packed his tooth and moved to Kentucky. The progress of SW Missouri (read: Branson) was too intimidating
for him.
GBR!
Bob
bnahusker Jul 24 08
.......and then, I botch the spelling of “punctuation� to keep the stereotypes alive!
Sheeeeeeeeeeesh.
C'ya!
Bob
ze bop Jul 24 08
Hey, Missouri gave us Wayne Newton in the Ozarks singing endless renditions of, '...donkey shame....daaarling, donkey shame....'...la lala la.
What's not to like about that?
Bubba Jul 26 08
Nebraskans have always been proud that the "N" on the huskers helmets, they state it stands for knowledge...
Same for Chickenhawk football...winning tradition since Sept 07...
No wonder all the expats live in MO..they want to as far away as possible...
Tim Aug 28 08
Mizzou sucks. Case closed. Two years of having to deal with their crap and then we won't have to hear about it again. However, the Mizzou "fans" have always had a bad case of diharrea of the mouth even when they sucked. So I am sure we will never stop hearing them throw up in word form. Ever.